jealousy.

Jealousy. Psychology Today describes it as, “when a person perceives a threat to a valued relationship from a third party. The threat may be real or imagined….Jealousy always involves a third party seen as a rival for affection or attention. Envy occurs between only two people and is best summed up as, “I want what you have.”“

UFF. That is a messy definition. It’s a word we all own at some point. It’s a word we all deny ever having. Life is full of jealousy whether we like it or not and the fairy godmother isn’t going to swoop in and wave it all away with her magic wand.

Leaning into this feeling can cause us to loose sight of who we are inside of our irrational thoughts. We can fight to win or we can fight to loose. The battle is ours to choose. It can seem like the little word that starts with a j and ends with a y could possibly be a good feeling because it means we care about something or someone. But if you really stop to look at it does God ever get jealous when we turn our attention toward something or someone other than Him?

If we change our thinking we can monitor our attitudes. When jealousy strikes it can feel like a match sliding across the sandpaper. The fire is just waiting to get started with every scratch you make. If we instead choose to identify the feeling and allow ourselves to feel it in the moment, we can then let it go without living under its pressing thumb.

I feel the match getting closer to the sandpaper lately. I feel like my life could possibly be unraveling at the seems and jealousy is egging it on. I love deep and hard and fast and when I feel like the people I love are being taken from me? The match strikes.

They are mine to take care of. They are mine to have jokes with. They are mine to feel safe with and comfortable with and hopeful with. They are mine to argue with and apologize with and pick myself back up off the floor with. Don’t you take that from me. Don’t you take them.

But God. He steps into the mess when we allow Him. He blows out the match and puts the sandpaper away. He lets us feel the pain and then He brings sweet relief.

That someone or something you are fighting over? They aren’t going anywhere just because a new subject was written into the story. They might be temporarily blinded by the newness but the newness will wear away.

God gives us the people and things we need. He didn’t add a character to ruin your life. He didn’t make you jealous so you would feel sad or angry or scared. He made you jealous to remind you of what you do have.

So next time you feel hot tear sting or the brush of the rough paper against your heart, remember that there is enough for all of us. God alone is enough. We must join Him in his enough-ness so that we can help others join Him too.